It’s a beautiful Friday in Abuja despite the hot sun…. I don’t understand this weather. I was thinking this period, we would’ve had a better weather.
Thank God it’s friday…..What’s happening where you are today? How are you enjoying your city? Today i have an interesting topic to discuss with everyone.
I have been thinking about this topic for a while and wanted to ask what’s the right age to move out of parents house or if there is any particular age you must move out?
I can’t wait to hear what most of us have to say about today’s topic. Few months ago, my kid sister and i jokingly told our mum we would like to move out. And like a typical Nigerian woman, she said “to where?” Out we responded. “Ok na, be going. Do you want me to help you pack? “. Every Nigerian knows the meaning of that answer.
Few weeks later, my sister brought up this same topic with my mum and we finally understood her reason. According to her, why would we want to move out of the house to a place where we would be paying rent while our parents stay in the same city with us. “If you are working in a different city where you have no choice but to find a house, then that’s a different situation” She said. Ideally, you are expected to move from your parents house to your husband house.
Why are we different? I mean we Nigerians, we think and see things in a different way most times. Not that its a bad thing but when you take a look at the westerners, they tend to move out of the house at a very tender age. For some, at the age of 18, 19, 20. In fact, by 21 if you still leave with your parents, it becomes a big deal (i stand to be corrected). Most parents feel that you have gotten to the when you need to be independent of your parents. No matter how difficult it might seem for them, it can’t be compared to we in Nigeria. They can easily get jobs, some usually run two different jobs, some leave on mortgage. Here in Nigeria, graduates find it difficult to get a job let alone an undergraduate.. But as i fondly say, it’s well.
My colleagues and i are where talking about when exactly is the right time to move out of our parents house. It was one of my colleague who was talking about moving out of her sister’s house that prompted our conversation. She actually moved in with her sister who moved out of their parents house as soon as she was done with her university. She in turn moved in with her sister when she entered the university and now she’s done, she feels its time for her to move out too.
“But your parents both stay in Abuja and your sister also stays in Abuja, so why would you still want to waste funds and live on your own….Its not necessary” I said
Elizabeth who is also my my colleague and a yourba girl concurred with my mum. Her reason wasn’t just about the finance that would be seen as a waste of finance but that in a typical yourba family, a woman is expected to stay with her parents until she’s getting married. Meaning you living out side your parents house is assumed you are getting married. She went further to explain that when you tell most Nigerian women that you want to move out of their house because you feel you are older and maybe you think you are financially independent a little, they would think you are looking for an avenue to be free to do what ever you like and stay out late. This reason might be the reason for some people while it might not be for some.
Well as for me, i would like to have my own space. Space not necessary because any one is troubling me at home ( family house), but because i just feel am older and too old to still be living with my parents. Living with your parents has its on pros and cons. But on the second hand, st aying with my parents saves me a lot of cost. I am free of paying house rents, electric bills, buying food stuff. Any thing i decide to buy for the house, is because i choose to. By staying with them, i can save up the little i feel i have and put it into something profitable.
A friend of mine of Facebook and i were taking on and he asked me “Do you live with your parents?” when i said yes, he was shocked. At your age he asked? Is anything wrong with that? I asked. I couldn’t tell if i should be angry or not. I gave him the benefit of doubt that he wasn’t insulting me. He gave me his reason why he was surprised to hear i was living with my parents at my age. “I started leaving on my own at a very young age and it’s been me all the way”. In a way though, am envious of you for staying with your family” He said.
Moving out of your parents’ house is a major decision. It is essential that you consider the impact of moving out. Your budget, career, and maturity level will all affect your first adventure into the real world where you will have many responsibilities.
The following are the differnt ways to know if you are ready to move out of your parents home.
- Know if your financially stable – Add up all the income you receive in one month after taxes (most paychecks will have taxes already deducted from them). If your income fluctuates slightly, figure out a monthly average by looking at the past six months of your pay. If your income fluctuates wildly every month, moving out might not be the best option.
- Make yourself a budget for rent by calculating 28% of your monthly income. Multiply your monthly income by .28 to find the largest sum of rent you can afford.Keep this number handy, and use it to find affordable housing.
- Calculate your fixed expenses. These expenses include: rent, monthly loans, car insurance and car loans, credit card(s), health insurance (if it isn’t deducted from your salary), phone, internet, utilities, cable, and any other sort of debt. You will also want to figure out how much you spend per month on food, entertainment, clothes, gas, and miscellaneous shopping.
So you tell me, have you ever thought of moving out? What were your reasons? when exactly is the right age to move out of your parents home? How do you feel about living with your parents till you get married as a woman? For men, when exactly do you plan on leaving home if you haven’t and if you have, at what age did you leave?
It’s all about you………………Never forget that!